Dear Alice,

I know.

It's not fair. It's not. But whatever baby wants, baby gets. So when we have been happily involved in 'parallel play' [meaning you with your squeaky bird, baby with her zoo train, and me with my People Magazine] and suddenly the baby wants the squeaky bird, and delicately reaches out and plucks it from your mouth...

Well, that is what we describe as S.O.L.

But I applaud you for laying quietly, if a little mournfully, watching the baby play with YOUR toy. YOUR bird. You had it first, didn't you? It's a shame.

But no, do not turn your big pug eyes to me. It is the rule around here. I'm sorry you find yourself so suddenly at the bottom of the ladder, but I'm afraid that's the way it must be. The rankings are as follows:

1] Mommy and Daddy. [we will generously put these two names on the same line, although I think it's clear that if we do a chip count, Mommy has enough fun chips to go all in, and essentially wipe out Daddy.]
2] Baby
3] Any future siblings to Baby [although trust me readers, they remain largely theoretical at this point]
4] Pug.

But honestly, I am very proud of how you reacted to this milestone. Baby took the toy directly from the jaws of the beast, and received little in the way of reproach.

You, on the other hand, got a Snausage. I think you'll find it to be a fair trade.

Love,

The Mommy