Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Besides, Kevin LOVES musical theatre.

Today was our big ultrasound. Although we have a really funny picture from said scan, I told Kevin I wouldn't post it, because of the damage it could do in like 12 or 13 years. Although parents are morally obligated to embarrass their children, starting when they are in utero seems a bit excessive.

There's another great one of the baby's hand, but we aren't sure if he's showing us that he can Hang Ten, or if he's headed to the University of Texas. Or that he's already into Metallica.

Our tech assured us that she had a great track record when it came to getting the baby to give up the goods and after we measured all parts and checked the important bits, she let us know that the baby weighed in at 10 ounces.

Kevin asked if that was a center, or a point guard. I said I thought it meant musical theatre, and Kevin replied that he didn't care if our son was gay, as long as he wasn't a Dodger fan.

So! Scarlett gets a baby brother, and I get to go shopping for lots of little blue sleepers.

Now, will someone come to my house and put all of this crap away?

Her are some Christmas pictures...just in time for New Years. I'm still struggling with the size of these photos. I swear this camera is going to end up costing us a new computer.

Scarlett may not understand Santa just quite yet, but damned if she doesn't understand new toys. That's a language spoken far and wide by all two year olds.

We hope everyone had a lovely holiday and are going to enjoy a happy and healthy new year. We are looking forward to everything 2009 is bringing, and hope the same for you and yours.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

I'm pretty sure she thinks my face has been replaced with a giant camera.

Still figuring out the whole flash/no flash thing. It seems we don't have enough natural light in our house. This might be a case of buying the shoes before the outfit. I might have to retrofit our house with skylights and bay windows for my pictures to achieve maximum density.

How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?

Easy. Pick up a Canon Rebel XSi.

Bear with me. I'm still learning. Frankly, I'm finding it a little intimidating to take the dial off that safe little green rectangle - the one that means "Completely Automated, You Fool."

In the past 36 hours I've taken roughly 150 pictures and have loaded them all to my computer. And that's it. Because I just figured out that the photos take up so much memory that my sad little editor refuses to work with them. I can't even rotate.

All little problems aside, this is one hot camera. Unfortunately, my models have been a little difficult to work with, as one has a cold, and the other one has a problem with chasing tail. Her own. But you know models. The good ones are never easy to work with.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

God wants me to have it.

My old roommate Stacey and I used to say as we drove past Graeters on the square "If there is a parking spot out front, God wants us to have ice cream."

Scarlett dropped my camera on Saturday morning, bending the lens in the out position. It is not working. Which may or may not be because I tried to fix it. I'm trying to figure out if this means God wants me to go to Costco and pick up the digital SLR I really want.

Except that, and you'll have to trust me on this, a Canon Rebel XSi is slightly more expensive than a Turtle Sundae.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Fashion Forward.

I don't believe in fighting the small battles. You want to wear your beach hat with your winter coat, even though when fastened in your car seat it gives you the Dumb Donald* effect, you go right ahead.

The weather is fluctuating between cold/rainy, to cold/a little snowy. I prefer the snowy. So does Scarlett, who points reverently and says softly "snoooooooooowwwww." Alice hates it all. I don't blame her - she's short. Must be tough to be down in all that weather. Near the ground.

We've introduced Scarlett to a few of our favorite Holiday Programs this season. The [original] Grinch was a big hit, although she was concerned for the dog. A Charlie Brown Christmas did not go over quite as well, and frankly, I don't blame her. All that existential crap about how Christmas has become so commercial. [Although who couldn't use a qualified therapist for a nickel in these tough economic times?]

*Points to anyone who knows who Dumb Donald is. I will freely admit that although I knew who I was thinking of, I had to resort to Wikipedia to get his name.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

First I sighed. Then I sighed some more.

Out of 4,000 pictures I snapped this weekend, none turned out particularly well. I'm just posting these so you can see that indeed, we did travel to Las Vegas, and we did get to see Cousin Maya, and that both Cousin Maya and Cousin Scarlett tried to make a break for the casino floor, and were then punished by being forced to ride a scary, scary bus that was driven by half a clown.

Oh, and it was just like being in Venice. Except for the Beefeater standing guard outside of a jewelry store. I'm not sure of the historical accuracy of that, but I'm going to let it go. Call it willing suspension of disbelief in Vegas. I think that more or less comes with the territory.

Thanks to everyone who made the trip to see us - it made for a glittery spectacle of a start to the holiday season. Nothing says "Thanksgiving" quite like slot machines and hookers. And all you can eat breakfast buffets. Not that I miss that feeling that only consuming an entire days worth of calories in one meal can give you. Mmmm, pastry course.

Anyone up for some Gelato?

Monday, December 1, 2008

I guess I should just call this one "Let Go!"

Or, maybe "Back!" or even "Mom!"

And when I watch this video, I honestly wonder how anyone could have any dog than a pug. Ok, I also wonder how anyone else could possibly think their kid is as cute as mine.

I sense I am a teensy bit biased.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008


The Frank's would like to wish everyone the happiest of Thanksgiving holidays. Enjoy your turkey!

Monday, November 24, 2008

I use aquaphor. And teeny tiny socks are REALLY cute.

No no. We aren't potty training yet. I am in no rush for that, thankyouverymuch. We just started walking. But we do think the potty is sort of an interesting addition to the mix, and we particularly like lifting the lid and dropping toys inside. Much like we also like putting our sippy cups in the mail drop for dad to find later.

There are things I had forgotten about being PIP [Pregnant In Public] over the last couple of years, and had to laugh as it all came rushing back recently as I foolishly stumbled into a conversation about labor. If you are like me, and a giant chicken about confrontation, here's a bit of advice you might find handy.

Don't talk about labor options, pain management, birth plans, feeding, sleep training, episiotomies, diapering, BPA free bottles, lead testing, circumcision, name choices, or water births with anyone other than the father. The only safe topic is diaper creme. And how cute teeny tiny socks are.

Well, at the very least, don't about them to me. If I have to have another conversation like that one at any time over the next 6 months, I'll crawl under the nearest table, and won't come out until the anesthesiologist has been called.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Poor Alice.

So, I'm sure you've all noticed that my posts have fallen off considerably in the preceding weeks. And the only thing I have to say is that it's really hard to type with your head in the toilet.

Baby Frank 2.0. Arriving stores May '09.

I've been collecting stories from my friends about being pregnant while parenting a toddler. I use "parenting" loosely. Not sure if passing out on the beanbag in the playroom while Alice and Scarlett use me as their own personal climbing wall is going to win me any mommy awards.

Anyway, hope everyone finds this news as exciting as we do. I can't wait to add real pictures of #2, although I think we all know exactly how many pictures get taken of the second, as unbearably cute as they may actually be. This ultrasound picture might be the only one in it's baby book.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Walking, more.

In the past week, Scarlett has taken off with walking. It makes my life both much easier, and much harder. But by harder, I mean "the best harder ever."

Although we did have a laugh at music class when I ruefully mentioned to her teacher, Miss Amanda, "Remember when she paid attention? Last week, when she couldn't walk?"

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Uncooperative Goblins.

I had visions of these adorable pictures of my big bad wolf, and my one little pig, and maybe even snapping a picture cute enough for a holiday card, but my subjects were a little less than cooperative. Particularly the one in pink, who made it clear from the outset that she was participating under protest, and that wearing such a monstrosity was clearly against some sort of union rule.

That is, if Pugs were able to unionize, which I sort of doubt, since they would probably meet at the union hall, run in circles, then take a nap. You really have to be more organized than that.

The one in grey quickly figured out the whole "trick-or-treat" thing, and was just intent on people handing her candy. I'm not kidding - I'm a little worried every time we go to someone's door, she's going to get upset if they don't give her a snack sized bag of m&m's.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

And I helped...

Forgive the quality of these pictures, I was busy in the kitchen when Kevin decided it was time to indoctrinate his daughter to the ways of the jack-o-lantern. I tried to run in and snap photos, but the lighting was bad, and the participants didn't particularly want me in their faces. So this is the only documentation we have.

Scarlett is recovering from a sinus infection [poor kid may have inherited my puny sinus cavities, an affliction I would wish on no one] and I haven't had the heart to take away her "punkin!", even though after 4 days, it's starting to look a bit weary. It may have to be relegated to the front steps, although it's inevitable that the marauding local squirrels will make short work of our short pumpkin.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

A real conversation.

K: I'd like to get to Costco.

L: OK. We can try to go this weekend. [pause] What do you need?

K: Clothes

L: You know, I think the ultimate goal is to get you to stop buying clothes at Costco altogether.

K: Why don't you just cut out my heart?

Sunday, October 19, 2008


OK, so in retrospect, the crown was not a great idea.

But the cake was.

Scarlett turned two yesterday, and we spent the afternoon at our friends' farm out in the country. We did not tell her that all those people weren't there specifically for her, but she didn't seem to mind much. She got to eat a cupcake, play in a sandbox, and watch her mother be inept at silk screening t-shirts. It was a pretty cool birthday. Thanks so much to Tom and Wendy for opening their home to everyone in the state. We look forward to a day when we can stay past sundown.

Today she got her very own birthday cake, but again, mistakes were made. She probably shouldn't have tagged along to the bakery, because all day we heard "HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAKE!!" Couldn't really grasp why we were just letting this perfectly good cake sit on the counter. What are we, stupid? CAKE. Then the whole crown thing. Clearly, I am not so smart.

To be serious for just one moment [I know. It's uncomfortable for me too. Bear with me.] I have to reflect a little on this past year. Scarlett has never ceased to amaze me with the strength and fortitude she has shown in the face of adversity. She has been put through the ringer, and just keeps going, and growing, and learning, and making us laugh. She has to play catch up every day, and will for a while longer, but she has astounded us with the gleeful way she attacks each morning. I can only imagine what she'll surprise us with in the coming year.


She did actually get cake on her birthday. And Miss Anna did a fine job of singing "Happy Birthday To You", as well.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Something seems very familiar...

Can you guess what it is?

Same farm. Same sweater.

Maybe next year she can wear it as a shrug.

Boy, are my arms tired.

I'd love to tell you that we've spent the last week touring in Tuscany, eating our weight in pasta, and drinking enough wine to sedate an Italian pony, but alas, the week was spent looking for the charger [Found! In the fruit bowl! Why was it in the fruit bowl?] and doing very mundane chores.

But today we went to the country and took a hay ride, looked at chickens, and ate Skyline. It may not be cheese from Parma, but it does come with a free bowl of oyster crackers.

Monday, October 6, 2008


One camera battery pack charger thingy. Last seen on my kitchen table and now gone, gone, gone. My camera is dead and I have no way of resurrecting it until I find that charger. It's making me nuts. It was such a little thing, I'm terrified that it may have been accidentally tossed in the garbage during a kitchen table purge session. Ugh. Will keep you posted.


Scarlett is still working on walking. She staggers a little further every day - today I think I counted 8 steps in a row. She will be evaluated by the physical therapist tomorrow, and I hope we'll be making great strides [yes, pun intended] soon.

Monday, September 29, 2008

After I recovered from the shock of what was happening, I managed to keep filming.

Somewhere just shy of 5pm.

Scarlett started standing up today, so I went and got the camera. Apparently, that brought out her inner show-off, and she took it to the next level.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

It's a conspiracy.

I know it's actually not, but the fact that the City insists on tearing up the street in front of our house during nap time seems a little too much of a coincidence. The signs read "from 7-5", so you'd think the work would start bright and early. No, that's OK, we'll actually start 30 minutes after your daughter goes to sleep in the afternoon.

I know, that has nothing to do with pictures of pigs and goats, but it is what is going on at Chez Spaghettio today, so it's on my mind. I'm also dreading taking a shower, despite the clean and soft lululemon yoga pants awaiting me, because there's always the chance that running plumbing on the wall next to her head will also disturb her REM cycles, and you know, we just can't have that today.

But the goats! And the pig! Saturday we went on an outing to a real working farm, and got to do all sorts of neat things like gathering eggs and milking goats. My cynical side thought "Yeah, nice. We bring our kids to the farm, pay them, and then do all their work. There's a scam I'd like a piece of." And I'm here to report that I was totally and completely wrong. Because if you think a bunch of pre-schoolers are going to be good at gathering eggs and milking goats, then you are wrong, wrong, wrong. Dude, they are soft. Most of them wouldn't even touch the goat, much less the part that milk comes out of. And half of them are useless when it comes to hitching up a team of horses to a plow.

We really do spoil them. I think Scarlett would gain much character if she had a little more farm experience. To start, I think we'll have her chop up the remainder of the tree for firewood.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Hippy Chick.

Oh, yeah, forgot to mention:

The word from the Dr's office continues to be good. Scarlett's hip is growing properly and the x-rays are showing us pretty angles that make everyone very happy. Scarlett will also be starting physical therapy - I'm particularly keen on this development because there is so much she wants to do, and I'm not totally sure how to help her learn.

Next checkup in 3 months.

Maybe she should have more friends her own species.

I'm so tired of looking at that stupid tree, and pictures of the stupid tree, that I'm completely ignoring the stupid tree that is laying down half on it's side in our front yard.

So, forget it. Instead, here are funny pictures of my kid, who thinks she's a dog. On the other hand, perhaps that's not so funny. Perhaps that's something we should look into.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Blog? What blog?


Anyone still listening?

Well, yes, we've been sort of missing lately, and for the 2 or 3 of you that aren't local, allow me to explain. This past Sunday, we got hit by a hurricane. And when I think about it, the signs aren't good, because this year we've already had an earthquake and locusts. I dearly hope someones not trying to tell us something. Because I've got the feeling that this city is not listening.

Anyway, most of the city [and by most, I mean 90%] was without power. There are still traffic lights that are out, and some people seem to forget that you should still, I don't know, STOP [I'm not talking to anyone in particular, Mr. Yellow Convertible Mustang] at them.

We were lucky. We lost our big front tree, and a large branch in the back, but nothing fell on the house and our roof is intact. My parents still don't have power, and it's starting to make my mom a little crazy. She wandered into my house the other day muttering about Oprah, Wheel of Fortune and curling irons. It's all very sad.

I have pictures of our sad tree and yard that I'll post soon, but frankly, even with power, things are busy here. This afternoon Scarlett has another x-ray and hip check, the first one out of the brace. Then there are meetings and work and buying a generator so my mom can do her hair. Because that is way more important than the steaks and salmon in the freezer.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Spot The Parenting Mistake.

Is it:

A] That chin strap is clearly a choking hazard.

B] The ladybug stamp is not made from an American Pediatrics Association approved ink.

C] A two year old with a bottle? Are you trying to ruin her for LIFE? TAKE THAT OUT OF HER HANDS RIGHT NOW YOU HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE, MOTHER.

or D] Plastics kill.

Ha! It was a trick question! There are NO parenting mistakes in this picture*, because this child has PERFECT PARENTS.

*unless you count the fact that to the right of the photographer, the TV is tuned to Spongebob Squarepants.

Girls Poker Night: or Why Mina should run for Vice President.

How did we go from tasteful appetizers,

And thoughtful card play,

To this?

When I told Kevin that dancing broke out at the end of poker night, he sighed and said "Yeah, that pretty much happens when we play cards, too."

[Can I brag that I made that baked brie, and that it was so scrumptious that if you have us over for dinner anytime in the next 10 years, I will probably be bringing it just to hear you all oooh and aaah? Because I'm no dummy. I know when something works, and is actually so easy that the whole thing took like 3o minutes to assemble and bake?]